Sean's email write-up of Isaan fight, May 2007:

Isaan is basically North Eastern Thailand, famous for being the poorest area in Thailand, for being a desolate wasteland and also for consistently producing the toughest fighters the country has to offer.The show itself was in Sakhon Nathon, a town not far from the Laos border, entirely unremarkable but for the occasional big televised Muay Thai shows organised by Channel 5 out there. The trip down (and back) was completely shit. I'm in such a good mood I really don't want to ruin it by talking about it, so suffice to say it was a 12 hour minibus ride (fifteen and a half on the way back) with 11 of us packed in like sardines in a tin (3 of which were hungover friends of Doi that had no reason for coming, had nothing to do with the camp or the fights, and just wanted a free piss-up and stay in a hotel room for a couple of nights). Assholes. Really. Squawky fucking ignorant fat mother fuckers, sweating and reeking of booze and slavering all over my fucking shoulder in their drunken stupors for the best part of 2000 kilometres. When the weren't sleeping on me they had the in-house TV cranked up full blast, butchering their way through Thai karaoke and a case of Saang Som whiskey. Fuckers. There and back again. Absolute fuckers.

Anyway. So where was I? Sakhon Nathon. In Isaan. Big televised show for channel 5. Going out live all over Asia. Open air ring. Hot day. Afternoon show. All good. I'll skip the build up shit and get on with it shall I? I'm on my way into the ring. I'm in the blue corner, sporting a huge pair of sponsorship blue Thaismai shorts (which got stolen after my fight I might add) and a nice pair of green 8oz Thaismai mitts. Hair is super spikey by the way, and getting rather long. I've also got a nice blue satin robe thing going on as well, and my cornermen (Kem and Francoise) have matching blue satin cornerman jackets. As I'm coming in I see my opponent for the first time. He's big, as big as me and in good condition. Tall. Young, probably early twenties. And looks fairly handy. He's kitted out the same as me only in red. His name's Superboy. You've GOT to be good to carry that off!

We both hop into the ring in our respective corners. I bow to the four corners and have a good pace about the ring to get used to the feel of it before the music starts. I run through my Ram Muay then step into the center of the ring where I touch gloves with my opponent while the ref runs through the rules (in Thai of course). I never look my opponent in the eye at this point, and rarely do so when I fight now. Not because I'm in any way intimidated, just that Thai's play too many games with you when you start interacting with each other like that. Nods and smiles and touching of gloves before trying to tear your face to ribbons with elbows and thumbing you in the eye in the clinch. Yeah. So I don't get drawn into the mind games. Besides, when I'm fighting I prefer to look at their chest and let my peripheral vision pick out any shots I need to avoid. Looking at the eyes can be misleading and you often miss kicks that start low.

Anyway, the ref's done. I bang my opponents gloves with my own, turn and return to my corner where I bow as Doi removes my Mong Kong and pops in my gum shield. The bell goes. I bow into my corner one last time, give a short prayer to Buddha or whoever the hell seems to be helping me through my last three wins in a row and walk out in to the center of the ring for the first round.

Here's the weird thing: Whenever you're absolutely on form in a fight, whenever everything just clicks into place and your distance and timing are spot on and everything feels relaxed and strong and natural, you really don't need to do that much. You don't need to make any judgement calls, any decisions. There's no "shit, he's throwing a right cross! I'd better slip to the outside, counter with a left upper cut, right cross right low kick and step off to the side" going through your head. By the time the thought's even entered your head you've already cracked him with three counter punches, a kick and are moving on to the next thing. It's fun. It dosn't happen all the time, rarely in fact, but now and again your body just decides it's doing things it's own way today and takes over. Hell of a good day for it too! I'm on live national television, my opponent's had 300 fights, is confident as hell and is basically up for kicking my teeth in for five rounds. One other thing about about days like this, when everything comes together naturally and everything just flows. It's kinda hard to remember exactly what you did and when you did it. I'll need to try and get a copy from the TV station (hopefully Doi can do this).

In any case, I'll just tell you as much cool stuff as I can remember and hopefully sort it into some sort of chronological order in the process. Bear in mind that this was by no mean an easy fight, it wasn't. It just so happens I was on form that day and wasn't going to let anyone beat me. First round I took it nice and light, Thai style, just trying to loosen up and get my rythm. I felt really nice and light on my feet. My footwork felt good and there was no hesitation in my movements. As for Superboy, he played it the same way as me for the first, though he also spent the whole round grinning from ear to ear at me (as I could see out the corner of my eye) as most Thai fighters tend to do when hold you in contempt. Anyway, just to let him know I mean business, towards the end of the round I let one hard left body hook go, which cracks him him in the floating rib with a satisyingly audible thwack. I've hit enough people and been hit enough to know that that shot hurt a lot, but he keeps cool, Thai style, and gives me a big smile and a nod.

Round two and as planned, after warming up in the first I come out hard in the second and really start to push the pace for the rest of the fight (I'm really damn fit for this fight and want to test it out over five rounds). In any case, in no specific order: I pop out a few jabs, hooking my hand around his guard and pulling it down just to see if he lets me (he does: mental note made). Again I flick my jab out, then whip in another viscious left body hook. Really. Vicious. Hard. I know for a fact it hurt him, but he nods, smiles, pats his side. Nods. That's an invitation to hit him again by the way. I oblige. Left body hook. Twice. Harder this time. He nods again but he's not smiling anymore. Whenever I throw my hands to his head he covers high exposing his ribs, reaching out with his left hand (looking for the clinch) and covering his own head with his right (note to self: watch out for right elbows).

Now if I was to see someone with a guard like that on a normal day, it would only take a second or two to analise it and work out some suitable counters. As it stands, none of that thinking nonsense is necessary today, and by the time I start (thinking) he already stepped in again, same guard and I've already reacted by taking his head clean off with a left uppercut (before following up with some of the body shots he seems to like so much). In any case, he seems happy to receive, and I'm more than happy to deliver. Over the course of the fight I must have thrown about twenty left body hooks, almost all of which landed with a fairly sickening crunch and a handfull of vicious left uppercuts underneath his guard. In with all these I add some speedy left jabs, the odd right cross, whip in some nice low kicks, rights and lefts, and tag him a couple of times with a front kick to keep him away.

For his part, he's pretty good with his legs, and has a fast front kick and strong right roundhouse. He also likes the clinch, and after a few more body hooks (he's not nodding anymore either) he's always looking to clinch with me when he gets the chance, hoping to wear me down with knees then finish me with his elbows. Common Muay Thai Misconception #1: Westerners can't clinch. As soon as he gets a hold of my neck I get my hands around his waist and move around to the side where I can flip him over my thigh and slam him into the matt. I get him with this a few times in the fight and slam him hard when I get the chance. In all fairness he caught me with the same thing once I think, then ran me into the ropes and tried to knee me in the chops on my way to the canvas, though my hand was there to stop it.

At one point (try and picture this, because it was cool as fuck!) we clinch, and I've got him round the waist with me right arm, whilst holding his right arm out at arms length with my left (you got that?). From there, I use my extended left arm to drag his right arm to his side, where I grab a hold of it with my own right (that's around his waist) before letting go with with my left (still with me?). Basically I've got a hold of him, with his arm trapped behind his back and my left hand completely free. Excellent! I punch him in the teeth, keep a hold of him, then duck behind him and proceed to nail him with about five unanswered knees in his right ass cheek. He dosn't like this, but the crowd does. Any other clinch related stuff? Yeah! I rolled underneath a punch at one point, coming up with my left knee on the inside of his left thigh and sweep him clean off his feet. Very smoothly done. Nice.

Hmmm... at one point I let my head drop too low and he cracks me on the top of the skull with a hard right elbow. I brush my glove through my hair. Check it. No blood. Not cut. Elbow time! Common Thai Misconception #2: Westerners can't elbow. Nailed him over the next few rounds with half a dozen cheeky uppercut elbows through the guard, and several sweet cross elbows where I either quickly parry his hand with my left and ride over his guard to mash him in the teeth with my left, or I scoop with my right and elbow with my right, or scoop left and elbow right. You get the idea. He nails me with a couple as well but I basically spanked him. Highlight elbow wise was my spontaneous and completely random decision to tear into him with a right reverse elbow. Well, my body decided it was doing it and by the time my brain kicked in and screamed "what the hell are you doing" I was already spinning so I just went with it. Glad I did too. Don't know exactly what it hit, but it was bone and he sure as hell didn't smile much after that. The crowd approved. In any case. I can't really remember much else. He landed plenty of knees (though I still beat him in the clinch) and a good few roundhouse kicks (though in the last round I returned almost all of them with one of my own), plus, going by the tenderness of my nose and face, a good few punches and elbows. Common Muay Thai Misconception #3: Thais can't box.

And there we have it. Final bell goes. He smiles (hasn't done that in a while) and we both raise our hands in victory. I start doing push-ups. He starts doing push-ups (he has no idea how fit I am). I keep doing push ups until he stops, then do another ten while looking at him, just so he knows who the boss is. I stand up. Ref declares me the winner. I'm very happy. The coach ride back sucked balls. However, I did see a bird of prey in the mountains that was large enough to carry off a small child. Really. Biggest bird I've ever seen in my life. Wingspan wider than my oustretched arms. Amazing. Also saw an Ostritch walking down the street in one of the villages. Strange.

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